Ordinary Thoughts

The time has come for us Filipinos to show our solidarity again. In this crucial time for our country, let us all unite and advocate for a clean and peaceful national and local elections. Let us use this significant event to show to the world that we Filipinos are responsible citizens. In spite of our divided political views, let us be united in one advocacy--that is to practice our constitutional right to vote. Let us tell the world that we aren't apathetic nor indifferent citizens. Show them we care for each other and for our future especially that of our nation.

Today, rise and shine early and proceed to your respective polling precincts. Make sure to cast your votes and persuade others to do the same. Make an extra effort also to survey your environment and report to authorities any election related irregularities you might notice. Our responsibility does not end after shading our ballots. It is equally important that we see to it that our votes, together with the votes of the rest of our countrymen, are counted truthfully. Let us not allow dirty politicians to use their money and buy people who'll try to manipulate election results in favor of their selfish aims. Our nation needs our cooperation now more than ever, and we are oblige to heed to this because whatever transpires in this elections, we are all directly affected.

Let me reiterate my point. It doesn't matter whom you're going to give your vote, as long as you are directed by your conscience and not by money (I'm referring to vote buying here), you are on the right path. Having said all these, lemme say good luck to all of us. Let's just all pray that everything will turn out fine. Good day!

Today is a special day for one of the special persons in our life--our mother. Let us utilize this occasion to thank them, to tell them how much we love and care for them, to apologize for whatever mistakes and/or insults and/or disappointments we have caused them, and to pay tribute to them in our own simple ways. It can be a lavish surprise party, an expensive gift, or just the simplest thing one can do to make them feel special on this very day. In fact, one doesn't have to force one's self just to buy a present for her because a simple I LOVE YOU coupled with a tight and prolong hug to go with sweet kisses will be more than enough gestures to make them feel the essence of Mother's day.

As for me, I still don't have a fixed plan as to how I'm going to surprise my mom. She asked me to buy her an ice cream the other day but I just shrugged. To make it up to her, I think I will have to surprise her today with an ice cream while saying my greetings, whacha think? It might be very simple but I'm pretty sure it would mean a lot to her especially that I don't give her presents often. This time, it's really the thought that counts. So Imma have to stick to this idea and buy a gallon of ice before I go home this morning. I just hope the ice cream won't become a soup when I arrive home considering that I'd still have to travel for at least 30 minutes. :)

Ma, you may not be the perfect mother--as we are not the perfect children--but your overflowing and unconditional love for us is more than enough replacement to whatever imperfections you possess. And for that we, all of your children, will be forever thankful for having you as our mother. If God will give us privilege to choose our desired mother, we will still unanimously handpick you over anyone else. We, at least I, could not just ask for anybody else.

Happy Mother's Day Ma. I can't be sure whether you will have the chance to read this someday, but if you do, please remember that I always love you and that will be in perpetuity. I'm sorry for my stubbornness, laziness, my being disrespectful sometimes, and for whatever pains and inconveniences I've brought you, please forgive me. Bear in mind that you are a wonderful mother and you will always be one of my precious few possessions. I don't have much in life ma, but for as long as you're with me (and our family of course), I feel so rich. :)

To all the mothers out there, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY. To all the children, please pay tribute to your moms because if not for them, you will not exist in this world. Go ahead and hug your mom. Also, don't forget to tell her how much you love her. :)

Hanging by a moment.

Today I was supposed to know the result of my examination in the job I applied for as a copy editor. I called the publishing firm yesterday but they told me to give them a callback today. When I spoke to the HR this afternoon, I was nonetheless told to call them again this weekend because they had just forwarded my essay exam to Manila and the result will not be available until Saturday.

After learning this, I was like ah ok this torture has to linger for a few more days. I've no other choice but to wait though.

What irritates me actually is not the delayed result of the exam. Rather, its the fact that I still can't figure out what I will do with my life after graduation. I have a part-time job presently but aside from the fact that I don't want to be stuck in call centers, the financial remuneration is not much considering that I'm only working every weekends. The only thing that keeps me going there is that I've been close to my coworkers and the job is not as stressful because I seldom receive irate calls. Sometimes, there's no call at all so I can just surf the net all I want. But really, I just love my employers because they're so kind. It's my first job also so I kinda treasure it til now.

Now this job I applied for in a publishing firm is not actually the one I have been longing for when I was still in college. I always wanted to go to Cebu instead and become a media practitioner. This whole idea of applying as a copy editor just came without signal and I just impulsively decided to apply because the salary is good.

I consider making decisions as the hardest job in the world, and now, I'm once again struck by its difficulty. I was so afraid that I might make an indecision but look at what I have dragged myself into. I'm left hanging by a moment. Hanging because I still have to wait for the result of my application in the publishing firm before I could decide to practice journalism in Cebu. Since I've already troubled myself in applying for this job, I decided to just wait for the outcome. If I'll make it, perhaps, I'll give it a year or two for experience. If I won't, Cebu here I come.

I actually do not see anything wrong with the work in the publishing company. First, it pays well. Second, I have been doing the work when I was still in the university. Third, I'm just here in the city, with my parents, with my friends, with people who are familiar to me, and the place of course, I don't have to adapt into whatever changes at all.

Nevertheless, it is because of these reasons that I want to go to other place. A place where I can start by my own. For many years now, I'm dependent with my parents, they wash my clothes, wash the dishes, provide me with allowance, they pay the bills, and all I do is sleep, eat, and work. Because of this almost couch potato lifestyle, I'm challenged to go off alone where I could learn to do everything by my own. That I think will give me a better definition of what life is. Also I'd like to work in a place where I know no one, where I would have to worry everyday what to eat, if I still have money for fare, and for my other necessities. In short, a life where everyday is a challenge. That I think that will make me a better man. Independent!

Most importantly, I want to go to Cebu because it's a place where I could best practice my profession. Dumaguete--my place--is very peaceful. This is best for retirees to spend their pension but not for a fresh graduate like me who wants to grow as a person and as a professional. There is almost no news in Dumaguete. And, being a journalist here will not even suffice to feed your hungry stomach including your family. In a metropolitan city like Cebu, the action is there and the money is there although the latter is not my priority as of the moment. My priority really is to practice my profession and grow as a person. But as of now, I can't be certain if I really know what my priority is.

I badly need intellectual advice. However, here's my gameplan. I'll just have to wait until Saturday, hear the result, if I'll make it, I'll get the job the muster the experience, if not, my Cebu dream will push though. How's that?

We're supposed to finish our project for our major subject today, but....

When I got out from my workplace at past 9 in the morning, I scurried to go home early. But since our residence is a couple miles away, I didn't reach home until past 10. I waited for a while because my mom was still cooking breakfast. After a quick breakfast, I read two chapters of "False Memory" by Dean Koontz because I didn't want to fall into deep slumber while my stomach's full. (AyokongBangungotin!) So, I think I fell asleep around 11 something.

I kinda loath to rise up early but I had to be awake at 3:30 p.m so I won't miss OUR rendezvous with my classmates (but since we have graduated already, I think there should be former before the last word) set at 4 in the late afternoon.

In spite of my efforts to be on time, I hit Dumaguete at past 5 which means I was already late for more than an hour but I was hoping they'll consider me because I reside a bit far from the city. While en route to the internet cafe of our (former) professor, I was baffled why not one of my classmates ever send me a text message to know my whereabouts. Since I was not able to reload my cellphone load balance, I didn't mind texting them assuming they started working with our project already.

To my surprise, I found not a single shadow from any of my (former)classmates when I arrived at the internet cafe. I asked the attendant, not surprisingly, she confirmed that not one of my classmate showed up. Upon learning this, I was like...what the f.... After all the haste I made, this is all I got? After informing them a couple days ago about our project, this is just their silent response? In case you forgot, I'm not the only who needs a grade here. And where the f... is your shame? I can understand those who went to Cebu for their internship including those who went home to their respective provinces. But for those who are just nesting in the city, what excuse do you have? Besides, we all have cellphones; yet, you didn't even have the balls to inform me thru text that you WILL NOT COME so I shouldn't have troubled myself? 1, 2, 3.... Oh c'mon, I don't deserve this. Nobody deserves this.

Or maybe I was just expecting you guys will cooperate. So perhaps I should just take the blame right? Uh! Get a f..... life!

In was supposed to finish it myself, but I could no longer retrieve the videos. In case you care.... But I have a feeling you won't give a damn anyways so come what may guys. Enjoy!

Time for updates now...

A lot of things transpired this past few days, and I don't know exactly where to begin.

1. I finally graduated.

2. We successfully had our two-day Lakta Tinta V (a seminar/workshop on campus journalism). The topics were great not to mention the fantastic speakers. I've been attending such activity for three consecutive years now but it was this year only that I think I learned a lot--maybe because all the speakers who confirmed showed up. By and large, it was a great event to end my stint in the publication.

3. Then, I applied as a copy editor in SPi. Much as I'd like to pull forward the hands of time so I would know whether or not I did well in the quite tough exam, I have to wait until April 5 to confront the result. I'm being optimistic, but my fingers are still crossed. If I won't get the job, I've to push through with my Cebu plans. It's only a matter of time now.

4. Right after that, we elected the new set of editorial board in the student publication. I'm happy for Jeremiah for being chosen as the new EIC, as well as to the rest of the neophyte in the editorial positions. It is now your time to take the helm of the leadership and responsibilities guys, just do your job well and everything will be just fine. You might commit blunders at first, but as you learn the ropes, it won't be that hard anymore. Just acknowledge your mistakes, if you must stumble then by all means do it, you'll need all these polishing experience. If it seems like the ordeal is insurmountable, just trust one another, most especially God, and you'll never fail.

For now, I'm still at work albeit its holiday. For the rest, utilize the idle week to reflect.

So long bloggers, happy holidays!

PS
as usual, wala na namang kinalaman ang title sa laman ng post...paxenxa...paxenxa...:)

Wow! When was the last time this blog was updated? Did I not promise to become a religious blogger? Well, I can only answer this line (one of my favorites actually): WORDS are not DEEDS!

Anyhow, I don't know what urged me to make another post. Ah! I know now! I'm inspired by "Up in the Air". Yup, I just finished watching it! Almost 20 minutes now as of this writing.

So what can I say about the flick now? Not much really. Make no mistake, it was a heart warming movie that reminds me how young people differ from their elders as far as their state of mind is concern.

When you are young, you tend to be very idealistic. After earning a degree, of course you'd like a well compensated job so you could buy all those stuffs you've been clamoring for since you were but a child. You want incessant parties, gigs, out of towns, name it. Then when you're tired of fooling around, you'd settle down and make a beautiful family. Send your children to school, work, attend their graduation rites, and then before you know it, you're already a grand parent. Retired and contemplating on your whole existence at the twilight of your life. Is this how you dream your life? Most people probably are.

As you grow older, however, although I don't think I've reached such maturity already to tell this so, you will realize that your insights on life is way simpler than you thought it was when you were younger. I mean as you advance in life, all those physical requirements you were looking for in a girl or guy would just fade notwithstanding your futile consternation. You will be taken aback as you find out that you could actually settle with someone who does not sing, not slim, not intelligent, no sense of humor, a college drop out, unemployed, or maybe with kids already. But on a whole new different perspective, you'd settle with that someone because you guys can get along well, you see the world in its 180 degrees turn with his/her presence, or simply because he/she has a nice smile, nice pair of lips, nice teeth. Whatever it is, things are basically different as you age.

At the end of the day, it is not important what state of mind you belong or you enjoy most. What is important is how you live your life and how well you cope with life's indispensable realities. You may not be able to stomach these but that's the way it is. Life will never be as beautiful as you fantasize it. That is an inalienable truth on life.

Now, you may be wondering why the hell I'm speaking of rhetorics here and not on the film. Like I said earlier, the movie inspired me to make this post but this post ain't about the movie.

In my two decades of existence in this quite imperfect world (aw?), I have not yet engaged myself in a nine-kilometer distance of non-stop walk--not until few days ago when some of the members of the student publication (xempre kasali din me) willingly joined the "Walk the talk" activity organized by Foundation University to urge people in the community to care for the environment.

The marathon walk started in the wee hours of February 13. Since we are not really 'morning people', we had to be awoke before the dawn broke. We braved the chilling Saturday morning air just to go to Valencia where we all assembled.

When the walk started, we were almost oblivious of the distance because we all enjoyed with our respective chit chats. But as the walk progressed, we gradually felt our leg muscles aching. I thought I would not be able to make it but thank God, I did it! And I was so proud of it!

The environmental walk ended at the facade of Robinsons Place Dumaguete where a little program was conducted before we hit our separate ways. At first, the program was quite fine but as the politicians/participants were introduced and made their speeches on stage, what seemed to be a solemn campaign for the environment turned into a political rally as most of the politicians indubitably recited their rhetorical speeches to attract voters--albeit you can't easily put us, the youth, in your pockets, sirs.

Anyhow, it was a great activity although it was rather tiresome especially for me who live a couch potato lifestyle. So, have you walked that far--9km? I did! :)

I know I have been not only a lousy blogger, but by and large a lousy person last year. Matter-of-factly, I think lousy is an understatement. Let me itemize here some of the not so pleasing things I did in 2009 so that, although I have this feeling nothing would change this year, I can sort of battle against myself to change for the better.

In the previous year, I know I've hurt other people's feelings intentionally and unintentionally; I have become a pain in the neck for many people to the point that they have resorted to curse and despise me for as long as they're breathing; I failed to keep bundles of promises; I have become the cause of delay for many activities and projects; as always, I have become a procrastinator and left a lot of unfinished works resulting to my superiors inconvenience and frustration; for many times, I lied to many people; I failed to show affection to people I love; at times, I admit that I became greedy and selfish; I failed to do my responsibility as a man of God; and so on and so forth.

One does not need to wait for a new year to change. However, it is at this time that, like many people who are fond of new year's resolutions, I find inspiration and encouragement to do better and be better. It is at this time that I reflect on those shortcomings and lapses, and live a healthy lifestyle. Healthy not only physically but emotionally, financially, psychologically, socially, and spiritually as well.

So apart from working hard to improve on my aforementioned negative traits above, part of my new year's resolution is to, first and foremost, become a religious blogger so I could update my blog as frequent as possible, second would be to spend more quality time with my loved ones especially my immediate family and with God of course, next is to do better with my academics and by all means do everything to graduate come March this year, and I shall also do better with my work. Actually, there's still many things I want to include here but as of this writing, these are my priorities.

I know pretty well that words are not deeds, and that these resolutions shall remain futile unless I transpire them into actions. But with dedication and perseverance, along with God's guidance, nothing is impossible.

P.S.
I hope you guys had the best Holidays spent with your loved ones.
Well, I hadn't had the grandest and most lavish Christmas and New Year but it was just incomparable and memorable because I spent it, very rarely, with my family. There is nothing more fulfilling that every quality second I bonded with them.
Happy Holidays Bloggers!

I have just watched "The Invention of Lying" which starred Ricky Gervais and my favorite Jennifer Garner. It was a romantic comedy film, but there's nothing more I could really share with you guys regarding the movie--just see for yourself.

I was just struck by the idea or of the situation that was brought to the big screen. What if nobody knows how to lie? What if everybody tells the truth however offensive it may be? What if lying was not discovered? And who discovered it by the way? What if the world is entirely different from the way we know it? Is it possible?

Well I don't have the answer either but I have a hindsight of it. If everyone tells the truth, then probably, many would find this post dull, a complete trash, and other related criticisms. Or, maybe I don't really mean talking about this "lying" crap, rather, I just want to benefit from the end part of this post (ie. to update my blog).

Yeah, we could all become harsh with our words if it's true anyway. We could freely say that one is fat, or thin, or ugly, or incompetent, and so on. Perhaps one could honestly say what he feels towards his opposite sex?

Above all, we will all rejoice because we won't have corrupt politicians. Now that should have been a better Earth, isn't it? However, we all know that this will forever remain a wishful thinking.

Hanggang what if na lang tayo ano?

It's at times like this
that I assess the value of my existence

When nothing but a solitary silhouette,
a recorded mellow voice imprisoned in a box
and an undisturbed silence
make up your surrounding

When kins and friends are beyond reach
that you notice every pebble,
hear every cricket,
and consider every attempt to stop breathing

Well, how do you handle,
a fragile and drowning emotion
that's pulling you down to the moist of the earth?

And then a soliloquy...

How was I living...
Is it really a life I'm living...
Is it worth living...

Perhaps, I should get a life first.

Before anything else, it's good to be posting again after being idle for quite a long time. Well, if we only have internet connection in the office these past days, I should have updated this blog religiously. But thank God I got no calls and by all means I could utilize my time updating this blog while at work. :)

Anyway, just a few more days and we will have to bid farewell to 2009 and welcome another year. But more than our anticipation to the entrance of 2010, another thing we must highly anticipate is the forthcoming presidential elections. Mainly because whatever its outcome becomes, it shall, directly or indirectly, affect not only our individual lives but most especially our entire nation. The outcome of the creeping elections shall determine the fate of us Filipinos. So it is only proper that we should all be participative in choosing the right people that would lead us as the years unfold. And if there's any sector that needs to heed this call seriously, it should be us--the YOUTH.

At this early, I believe that most of us already have bets amongst the presidentiables right? However, I think it is noteworthy that we should set standards for those candidates whom we should be entrusting our votes. I mean this is not the time to just apathetically say "Bahala na si Batman". We cannot afford to be indifferent because we are talking here of our collective future. We should elect a leader whom we believe is apt for the position.

So how do we choose the right leader then? Well, I don't know that much but I think we don't need to ask the soul of the late Ernie Baron just to be enlightened, right? You have to have a solid basis. By saying that, it means you have to track their records, their credentials, personalities, integrity, skills, intelligence, and others. Hindi pwede yung ibubuto mo na lang si ganito kasi feel mo lang. I know it is our Constitutional right to vote, pero kung ganun din lang ang magiging basihan mo sa pagbuto, or worst kung suhol din lang ang basihan mo sa pagbuto, wag na lang.

In this connection, it is vital to watch various presidential forums because they are few of the avenues for us to filter the right people to become our next chief executive. An example of this was the recent Presidential Forum organized by ANC. I don't intend to influence your choice, but lemme just share my views of the said forum after watching it.

Among the presidentiables who participated in the forum, I could cut down my list to only three candidates of which I will include Senators Noynoy, Gordon, and Sec. Gibo. For me, only the three of them standout from the rest of the candidates. Well, I have always considered Noy and Gibo in my list but after watching the forum, I was convinced that Gordon also deserves the position like the two. I won't go elaborating my reasons here, rather I want you guys to see the forum and decide for yourself. Although it shouldn't be the sole basis for our selection, it helps greatly. Again, I'm calling to the electorate, especially to my fellow youth, to participate in the coming elections and vote intelligently.

Last time, we surprised him with a despidida party during one of the meetings of the staffers in the publication. And truly, if I may base this from his reaction, he was indeed surprised to hear our special messages and acknowledgments for him. He was even teary eyed.

This post is supposedly for Noriel only but I know that once I get this post published, everyone can read. So I should be introducing him to you. He is Noriel Bajon Jr.--a blogger, a friend, a colleague, an adviser, a very talented guy, a course mate, and a very wonderful person--as in walang masamang tinapay sa kanya and he can wear any hat anytime and he could handle it very well.

He was a sophomore Mascom stude while I was a freshman when I got to know him . However, although we were course mates, we did not become close instantly because he was still a bit timid then, not until we both decided to join in the college student paper. Since then, I saw him transformed into a lively, jolly, and confident individual with overflowing talent and ceaseless energy.

Every time he enters the office and sees the low shoulders of the staffers, just one joke and he would send everyone laughing out loud effortlessly. He is an inborn comedian. But aside from that, what I admire him most is the way he deals with people around him. He is definitely a debonair--a friend to everybody. For four long years that I've known him, I couldn't say anything bad against him.

But just last month, he finally graduated which would also mean he has to leave the publication because a job is also waiting for him in Bacolod. I know he would be a big loss to us, but I understand we all have limited time in the university. Sooner or later, we would all be graduating and leave the publication at once. Anyhow, we know that our friendship is not limited to the publication alone, nor will it end when one leaves. On the other hand, we know that it would be continuous despite the distance and so we are holding to that.

Perhaps I, like everyone else in TN, am not yet accustomed to the thought that he will no longer be there to cheer us, he would no longer be there to perform for us, and he would no longer be there to let me borrow his laptop and play plants vs zombies or watch movies all night.

Bon Voyage! Hapit na pod mi, one more sem to go! :)

---

As we bid farewell to one of the members of our family in the publication, it is truly never easy especially that he was one good soul and a very wonderful person. But on a positive side, we are happy for him because I know that this is what he wanted. Basta, we will miss you Noh and thank you for everything. Kung idol ko nmo, mas idol tikaw Noh. Godspeed and do well in your career. See you at the big one!

After enjoying a few days of vacation brought about by the semestral break, it's back to school again. It is high time again to hurdle another semester full of school works--assignments, quizzes, projects, etc. It is high time again to get frustrated with our no-show teachers who would teach us nothing with our major subjects.

And speaking of subjects, it's a good thing that my remaining subjects this semester are all major subjects. In other words, no longer will I be worried with my arts subjects because I'm saying goodbye to them all.

I could still remember my tender years in the university where my prospectus is loaded with arts subjects--Social Sciences, Filipino, English, PE, and Math--my least favorite. Modesty aside, although I got high grades with my Math subjects and that I'm proud to say that I learned more in this subject compared to my secondary years, I still don't like this subject much. Perhaps, dealing with numbers isn't just my forte that is why I end up taking Mass Communication.

Nonetheless, I have a feeling I'm not the only one who seem allergic with Mathematics. I would presume that a lot of students also find difficulty with this subject. Well, they could not blame us because Math is Math and you can't argue with that. If you can't understand it then you can't understand it, unless you get a tutor and seek for a little help.

It's absolutely true, maybe you just need a tutor to help you understand the principles of Math especially with your Algebra lessons. However, you may find it awkward also to hire a tutor who is a complete stranger to you and let him/her come to your place. The good news is that, you don't have to stick with this conventional way of tutoring anymore if you find it inconvenient for you.

Like they said, we are now living in what they call 'Computer Age'. Truly, we can now do a lot of things through the help of our computer. Even online tutoring has also become pervasive in the internet today. This means you can now get Algebra help without leaving your computer. Just surf the net and you can find many sites that offer online tutoring. One of these tutoring companies is TutorVista where they offer 24/7 online tutoring.

With this contemporary way of tutoring where you can have it anytime and anywhere so long as you have internet connection, seeking math answers for your math problems or any other math word problems and algebra word problems should now be more convenient for you. Topics such as Quadratic Equations and others should not worry you anymore, thanks to algebra 2 help.

But anyway, I'm just so happy I already passed my college algebra and trigonometry. :)

Last night, (if I may borrow these words from our EIC) marked another milestone in the annals of the publication’s history. We just had to put an end to the two-month training of the newbies in the publication.

To come up with a sound decision, the editorial board made a deliberation as to who’s going to make it and who’s not. It was not an easy task of course because whatever decision the board makes, it will directly or indirectly affect the motivation or maybe even the life of the newbies. It might even affect their studies, since we are all full time students here, although it totally depends on how they accept it.

And so a painstaking assessment to their performance during their stint in the publication became our solid basis for the decision. There were verbal tussles among the editors which only proved how difficult the tasked put on our shoulders that time. Matter-of-factly, we even had to reminisce how we went into the same process during our fresh months in the institution. Needless to say, we also felt the same amount of trepidation (if I may use it in lieu of nervousness), the same amount of thrill, and the same amount of cold sweats, thus we were utterly sensitive to their feelings. Of course we understand how painful and frustrating it must be for those who won’t make it, but we have to come up with a decision however hard it may be for us, for them.

I always believe that the hardest job in the world is to decide, and again, I have just proven it right last night. After a careful assessment and deliberation, we finally reached a unanimous decision. But our task did not end there for we still have to announce the decision to them.

Before we revealed their verdict, a series of speeches among all the staffers was done first. Then, finally, we heard the words from the newbies. Most of them were nervous, some tried to be confident, some were teary-eyed, and some even burst into tears. Now could you still break the bad news to them?

Nonetheless, we still have to tell them, after all what’s the use of our deliberation? I don’t know how it went so fast, but we were able to tell them in just a few minutes. But after that, the editors all felt the guilt haunting us. We just saw mixed emotions from them. For those who made it, we saw overflowing joy and gratitude, but of course, we also saw disappointment. I just hope that they would understand that our decision and accept it without hard feelings—I just hope because I was not able to sleep well last night. I have been in the publication for three joyful years now, but I’ve never been caught in I what I considered the most awkward situation of my student journalist’s life, until last night.

On a lighter side, I would like to congratulate those newbies who are now officially members of The NORSUnian. I hope you would continue to excel, stay humble, stay responsible, and keep your spirit up. God bless us.

I saw a man
staring at me—not winking
His mind shouting for help
albeit his silence

He’s trapped in a dark smoky world
helpless, exhausted

He’s barring a tear
that’s been peeping in his tired eyes

His soul bathing
in a fathomless river of solitude

He stretched his pale lips
faking a smile
But it only made him
more miserable
His soul wrecked

I’ve never seen a man
with such a dying spirit

I wanted to help
cheer him maybe

But I was bitten by reality
I don’t differ to this man
I ain’t capable of helping
I’m just a reflection of him

This house is as empty as a vacuum
Notwithstanding my presence
I’m just so detached from the world
No one to chat with or cry with
Not even a beep from them
Just a radio

So I continued writing this piece
alongside a black coffee
Every sip is a hope
That its bitterness
Would drown at once
this emotional turmoil

Before I take another gulp
I saw the man again
But now I’ve figured
his identity
I am not his reflection
it’s the other way

Oopps...Lemme correct myself, I don't mean I want to have carpentry as my source of living in the future (although I am not closing my door to the idea). I just want to know a little bit of this craft.

Of course, I am seeing myself as a husband and a father someday, so naturally I am expected to fix the fence or maybe repair some broken cabinets or drawers and all those simple hammering jobs. For God's sake, how will I perform such job when I can't even properly use a hand saw? I am not even sure if I could drill a small hole inside the house or use those simple hand tools myself. Aside from turning a flashlight on and off, what else do I know? (sighs)

Well these are just self-inquiries. I believe it's never too late for me to learn some of these things someday--before I'll start my own family. What about you guys, do you have the same inquiries? Perhaps, we have become so dependent to all these touch or press stuffs we are enjoying in our generation now that we are no longer minding those simple things I've mentioned above. I hate to admit it but I'm guilty of this.